And the Party Ends

I can tell you that sleeping last night wasn't easy.  It was hard knowing that we would wake up and soon have to send our orphans back to the orphanage.  We have showered them with love, affection, attention, and gifts all week, yet we would have to put them back on a bus, knowing the situation that they were headed into.  My heart was heavy at breakfast already, because we found out that sweet Zhu Zhu could not be adopted after all.  We had a family for her and everything, but she has a living grandfather, and even though he does not care for her, he will not allow her to be adopted, which is what she desperately wants.  Diana, sensing the heaviness in the room decided to try and put a smile on all our faces.

After breakfast we went back to the room and the girls did make-up one final time.  I did Zhu Zhu's hair in french braids which has become her favorite hairstyle.

Everyone started taking lots of pictures knowing we would all be saying good bye soon.  This is Phoebe, with the girls.  She is on of our new Aussie friends.

We captured one last family photo before heading off to our last assembly.  This assembly is really hard to endure, because the kids write letters to us, and we write letters to the kids.  They are read at assembly, and as they are read, the tears start flowing.  It was so heart wrenching to see the faces of these children as they heard the words that they have so longed to hear, wo ai ni, or I love you.  

I want to take a minute to tell you about this precious boy.  His name is Lee.  He has cerebral palsy, a mild case.  However, because of that Lee was abandoned.  He has lived his whole life wanting a family.  He has had the best attitude at camp, and has really impressed us all.  When it came to letter reading time, he was already sobbing when it was his turn to have a letter read to him.  However, he didn't want to go up there to have his letter read.  He sat on the floor near me shaking from the tears that couldn't stop flowing.  His letter was read, and he never looked up.  Then when the end of the assembly came, and they dismissed us, finally his voice broke through the tears, and he asked if he could say something.  He got the microphone, and in Chinese he said, I really hope that a family will adopt me.  I want to be adopted.  Every volunteer in the room broke into a sobbing cry.  You know what is saddest about his request, he is 15, so the Chinese government will not allow him to be adopted.  All he wants is a family, and for him it will never happen.  He doesn't know he can't be adopted, so he waits everyday wondering if he will be chosen.   This is the reality of these kids lives, and it stinks.  My heart is broken for him, but I will pray that one day he finds the bigger family that I am a part of, and that he feels loved.

 Hugging their necks, and loading the buses was not easy.  Diana was very bull headed about the whole good bye thing.  She charged off almost emotionless, but once she was on the bus, she didn't want to break eye contact with me.

 Zhu Zhu on the other hand fell apart.  I know it is hard to tell from the picture, but she has tears streaming down her cheeks.  It was hard to let her go.  I had dreamed of the adoption possibilities for her, that it was hard to know that I was sending her back, and soon she would be just like Lee dreaming of a family that is never coming.  With as tough as today was, I would do it all over again.  I again am leaving a huge chunk of my heart right here in China.

 To lift some of the heavy load, some of the volunteers headed up to the "spa."  At the spa, they have some fish imported from Turkey that eat the dead skin off your feet.  What a strange feeling it was!!  It tickled at first, but then it was very relaxing once we got used to it.

Noelle deserved this reward too!  She has been an excellent servant to these kids this week.  Nothing about this week has been about her and seeing her heart in action has been a reward to me. 

We leave Xi'an in the morning to head back to Beijing. 

Please pray for safe travel for all of us as we head back.  Pray for these kids that lives are changed.  Pray for the translators, that seeds have been planted.  Also, pray for this camp.  They have two more weeks here.  I will explain more when I am home, but just pray that Satan would stand back.